COMMENTS

9 responses to “Ask Joan: Quickies”

1. If you’re afraid of role playing give it a start with something mild. My wife and I were always intimate but we never did much role play. Now we do; usually with my wife the boss and me her well behaved husband. It is a turn on and when I have an orgasm issue or ED event we can incorporate that into role play. With prostate massage we’re even grown our role play to be where I’m her ashamed husband and she’s pleasuring me anally. A little extreme but great fun. We wish we got into years ago.

   Reply to Anonymous Happy Husband

2. Listening to a lot of these comments is quite helpful, however, my issue is that I have lived alone since I was in my early 40’s, after a divorce etc…It had been about 30 years since I really dated or had sex. I had a bad marriage and just delved into my kids and work! I am now 75. I am slim, healthy and fairly good looking for my age. Last year I met a really nice guy who was a little over 2 years out of a divorce. I did not want the relationship at first, I was too independent and liked my women friends. We have sex, I was very scared at first, and thought It would be terrible, but I’ m happy I discovered it again, however, Tom wants sex all the time, its almost like he has an addiction. We can make love 3 times in a row and he ejaculates every time and I’m lucky if, with the help of a vibrator, I get to have an orgasm. He could literally have sex every day 3 times a day if I let him. I can’t do this, and he knows how to please me too. My issue though, is that I feel like he is with me because I can, and will have sex. He can’t keep his hands off of me and sometimes, I just want to be hugged, and hug him, but, I think in his mind when I touch him, he thinks I want to get intimate again. He is very loving, and we have now been together close to 2 years. I always have to tell him, I need space, and that he is smothering me. When I tell him my concerns, he says”I know, I need to control myself”. Not sure how to handle this. I really care for him and he thinks, I am just a smart and sexy lady! Imagine I’m 75years old and he is 70! Maybe I need not complain! Any thoughts on this? I bet my kids would be shocked!

   Reply to Vivian Bellini

3. I think you are right, Erectile dysfunction is the most difficult problem men faces. And I guess in this case the one should consult immediately to the expert. This issue can be solved.

   Reply to Molissa

4. Jesse GoldBerg I am Looking For A Friend With Benifits It Works .

   Reply to jesse Goldberg

   1. I recently broke up with this guy after I found out he has a girlfriend. We still continued to see each other after I found out. It wasn’t the sex that kept me around, I thought we had something “good”. I honestly thought he’d choose me. Stupid right?. Anyway,I eventually let it go,but when I masturbate, I often picture him and his girlfriend having sex. I am talking about from the foreplay to actual penetration. I’m there in the room in the corner wearing a silk black mini robe, black thigh high fishnet stockings, sexy red pumps, and black shades to cover my eyes. I can see everything they are doing, but they can’t see me. I don’t leave until they finish or I finish, whatever comes first. Its like I was never there. I don’t know…it sounds weird to me because I normally don’t get off to other people. I was thinking its because I know what’s going on and not lying to myself about it. I’m an overtthinker so I’m wondering,is there a deeper meaning to this?

      Reply to Shay

5. There are many physical and emotional benefits of having sex as you age. But sex is not everything in a relationship as it shouldn’t be. Friendship and understanding and common interests are more important.

   Reply to Helen

6. I am 74 nd in fair health. I am financially independent. This is a big problem in itself. My husband and I were married 23 years and had 2 boys. He was absent from family life. When I finally felt safe enough for a divorce he married a 14 younger women who he has 2 daughters with and are very wealthy but he is out of my life thank goodness. We are on very amicable terms, but he has said he has a new family with his girls and ignore his sons completely. He stole their trust funds. My next boyfriend was passive aggressive. stole, lied, cheated etc. I supported him completely. My #3 friend was also financially dependent on me. We fought constantly, he lied, cheated was physically abusive and very mentally abusive. I got rid of him 14 months ago after 20 YEARS and got a therapist and moved to a 55+ community. I love my house and home but am terriby lonely. I have never lived alone since college at 23. I do not like the people in the community. My oldest son is like his father ,who physically abused him. He rules my granddaughters by fear and intimidation so I am not involved in their lives. He lives 30 miles away. My youngest son is 1900 miles away with his wife and my two grandsons. We are very close. I am very active in handling several properties I have and financials. My youngest helps me(both sons, husband and my father are lawyers). But I am so lonesome and miss sex a lot. I am afraid to go on a dating site because of my privacy and being used again. My mother was an alcoholic. My brother was bipolar and killed himself at 54. He had 2 daughters but their mother does not let us communicate. I have a hard time physically going to New York but about 2 times a year. How do I find companionships that I cam trust?. Are there dating sites that screen men and try to find me a friend?

   Reply to LAUREL T ROSENWASSER

   1. Laurel, I’m moved and concerned. If you’d like to have your question considered for my column, copy and paste what you wrote here into an email to email sexpert@seniorplanet.org. Thank you.

      Reply to Joan Price

7. Joan, I just love your column and I find it helpful, hopeful, and healthy. We’re stlll here so let’s celebrate!! If only I can find Mr. totally functional senior!
   Thank you for sharing life with us.
   Helene

   Reply to Helene Weitzner