Open Thread: What?

Earlier this year, I was permanently freed from jury duty.  The administrator looked at the letter from my otolaryngologist and my last audiology report, with the words “profound hearing loss” and signed off on it.  She said “You’re good to go, you’re off jury duty forever.”  Neither she nor I expected what came next: I started to cry.  She handed me a tissue and said, “Most people hate jury duty, why are you crying?” And I told her “Because it’s one more part of normal life I can’t do anymore.”

I went from mild to moderate to moderately severe, to severe to profound in eight years. I have always thought “profound’ as a term for the last stage of hearing loss to be very apt….because it makes a person, by necessity, philosophical.

Adapting to deafness

I’m not in a silent world – not yet – but I’m only a year or two from a cochlear implant. I’ve been wearing progressively stronger (and more expensive!) hearing aids since 2018. Even with hearing aids, I need captions in my TV/cable service. Forget about going to a movie or play – the contraptions on offer (if they have any) are awkward, complicated or not really effective.*  It’s hard to go to Mass, too.  Right now I’m fixing my stereo setup so I can listen to every record in my vinyl collection. (Twice.)

While I still can.

The Hidden Disability

Meanwhile, I am reminded daily what a constant, taken for granted sense hearing is.  It’s a hidden disability. Sound is a constant companion – conversations, eavesdropping, music, the sound of birds as the day fades, car and bike horns, the changes in tone in conversations.   When I take my hearing aids off when I go to the gym, I can see the women around me moving their lips but I’m not sure they’re talking to me. (I sometimes wonder if they think I”m a snob).  I’ve gotten really good at pretending I can understand people who talk to me (or try to) on subways or busses.  “No kidding” is a favorite  response.

In daily life, it’s a hassle, too.  Reader Carol commented, in a previous Open Thread, about “…customer service reps who do not speak English…” For a hearing impaired person who has trouble distinguishing “b” from “p” or “t,” a customer service person with a strong accent is a disaster.

I have to learn how to meet the world differently, and hope that the world can learn to meet me differently as well. That’s why this month (May is Better Hearing and Speech Month), I want everyone to pay close attention to this Ted talk, which says everything an HOH person has to say on the daily.

YOUR TURN

How about you? If you are hard of hearing, how do you manage? Share your tips in the comments!

* For NY State residents,  call your state senator and ask them to support Bill S9888, which would ensure more hearing accessible screenings. You can find your senator on the NY Senate website. Outside of NY, Landmark theaters has a comprehensive set of offerings for the hearing impaired and you can learn more here. So does AMC theaters, info here. And here’s a comprehensive overview of options for NYC theater and opera goers.

Virge Randall is Senior Planet’s Managing Editor. She is also a freelance culture reporter who seeks out hidden gems and unsung (or undersung) treasures for Straus Newspapers; she writes frequently on Old School New York City and performs at open mic readings throughout New York City.  Send  Open Thread suggestions to editor@seniorplanet.org.