The Man Cave on…Surviving Life’s Challenges

Survivors of disasters – especially those who overcame long odds – have much to teach us in handling the challenges in our own lives.

Over the past 25 years, I’ve interviewed more than 100 survivors for many of my books. I’ve seen common mindsets and techniques they used to overcome adversity. The decisions they made, and more importantly how they made decisions helped them survive life and death situations, but can apply to challenges in day to day living.

Whether it’s an overwhelming situation  – a devastating diagnosis, a family crisis, or financial setback – or an important goal that seems unattainable (like quitting smoking or starting a life-saving diet and exercise regime), the following tips and insights from survivors can help:

Fight the Adrenaline Rush

In a sudden crisis adrenaline kicks in and often prompts us to take quick action. Many scammers take advantage of this – a call from “Social Security” that your number is being used in criminal activity and the courts will seize your accounts unless you move them) or your grandchild is in a foreign jail and needs bail money now.  Fight that urge for just a short period, and instead pause.  Often times the simple act of pausing gives us time to think of several options, rather than leaping into action, according to one school of thought.

Don’t Always Stick to “The Plan”

Some people force the situation and their actions to meet their plan or their schedule – and cause a high pressure situation. For instance, five hikers trekking up Half Dome in Yosemite National Park crossed paths with two climbers coming down from the summit, who warned them of potential lightening storms. Even when thunder boomed, they continued the climb with an attitude of we’ve come this far we can’t stop now. That mindset caused two of the hikers to lose their lives. It’s better to let the current circumstances and conditions form your plan (for instance, to buy or sell a home), even if it means abandoning the schedule entirely, and trying again down the road.

Do the Next Right Thing

Do “the next right thing” instead of dwelling on the past or the distant future.  Survivors don’t waste time thinking about how they got into such a position or who’s to blame, or thinking “what’s the use” from worrying about the far distant future.  Instead they look at what they need to do now, to move them one step closer to their goal…something many people use when caught in a financial crisis like a huge credit card bill.

When Ernie Hazard’s off-shore lobster boat was ambushed by a storm with a 90 foot rogue wave, the vessel capsized and three of his crewmates perished.  Ernie was able to get into a life-raft and survived for three days in storm-tossed seas by focusing on getting through each hour.  He didn’t waste energy thinking about the events leading up to the accident or even about the difficulty of being rescued.  “I had no idea if I was going to make it or not but I was determined to go down fighting,” he said.

Use the power of little steps

Try the technique used by every Senior Planet Sponsored Athlete – recognizing that even the smallest bit of action can get the ball rolling toward fulfillment. Noteworthy accomplishments are rarely gained without behind the scenes preparation that might feel insignificant at the time, Yet taken together with other little steps, they send you toward your goal.  Little steps give you the feeling of control, and control keeps helpless feelings at bay and the temptation to give up.

Think of those who are important to you

According to a study published by the National Library of Medicine, many new parents are motivated to quit smoking when their children are born – because their children need them. Older people stick to heart-healthy diet and exercise programs for their spouses, children or grandchildren.

And sometimes it is the difference between life and death. The toughest survivors I’ve interviewed often said they wanted to live for someone who would be devastated without them. Loch Reidy  was swept off a sailboat 250 miles out to sea and had to tread water for two days while being pummeled by avalanching waves.  “I started to give up on day two,” recalled Loch, “and then I thought of my 14 year old daughter Ashley.  That gave me strength to fight a little bit longer so I could be with her again.”

Your Turn

I personally have used these tips – to leave my corporate job, to open a full time speaking and writing business, to endure an illness, and to help me successfully navigate a divorce. How about you?  Share your success in the comments!

Michael J. Tougias is a New York Times bestselling author and co-author of 30 books for adults and nine books for middle readers. His latest book is Extreme Survival: Lessons From Those Who Have Triumphed Against All Odds. Tougias speaks to both business groups and at public libraries across the country.  www.michaeltougias.com